2017 MLB Predictions

Let’s all come back in several months and note how wrong I am.

2017 Predictions


Is Danny Duffy Cy Young Material?


Danny Duffy.

That name was a swear word in my house in 2015.

When I would talk about him, I was sure to talk about walks, hit batsmen, and blown leads.

Something changed in 2016. Pitching coach Dave Eiland was quoted in the Kansas City Star on June 16 last season:

Continue reading “Is Danny Duffy Cy Young Material?”

What The Cubs Win Means To Me

Photo Credit: CubsInsider.com

Editor’s Note: I hate the fucking Cubs.

In today’s world of hot takes, fast takes, quick takes, rapid takes, speed takes, hot corner takes, instant takes, can-of-corn takes, Subway Fresh Takes and pronto takes, sometimes it’s also a little nice to sit back and process something before reacting. It’s a lost art, but it’s something I had to do with this Cubs World Series victory. After a good long week in which we absolutely got our asses kicked as a country, regardless of party affiliation, I had the following ten conclusions. Continue reading “What The Cubs Win Means To Me”

So Close

We’re so close to the election. Is that good or bad?

It’s bad, isn’t it?

Here’s kind of a round up of thoughts since I was traveling a bunch this week.

Baseball has everyone captivated.  Good.

All this pre-election fraud is only going to fuel Trump when he loses.

A good conversation happened at the airport last night between me and a new friend. Talking our favorite players growing up.  I listed off Wally Joyner and Carlos Beltran as my two favorite of all time. When we came around to picking one pitcher to start a team as an ace, I said Nolan Ryan. He thought for a minute and retorted with Greg Maddox.  Man.  What a great conversation!

I said Nolan Ryan was twice the pitcher Roger Clemens was, but that may have been wrong.

20 Wins/Season: Clemens by 2 (4 total)

k/9: Ryan by .09

HR Allowed: Ryan by -42, with three years extra service

Shutouts: Ryan by 15

Neither threw a perfect game.

But Roger Clemens never kicked the shit out of Robin Ventura, so I think we all know who the winner is.

I think I’m voting for Clinton, for what it’s worth.


Balancing The Scales

So much has happened in the last 48 hours politically and basebally and I’ve been remiss in getting anything into print because I had some real life happening.  I had clients in town for a night and we did the whole hang out thing, and tonight I got stuck at work until 9:30. I’m not saying this to complain.

I’m saying this because more so than ever before, this election has captivated our lives like a hit drama, because it’s a drama that hits your dick and keeps punching. I stepped out of the game for two nights so I could handle my business, and I missed a lot of stuff.

Here’s the point. You don’t care. You will still either be reading this, or like almost everyone else in the world, not read this. If you read it, hopefully the image of the election nut punching someone is funny enough to get a chuckle out of you because dick punches are never not funny, but it’s easy to forget that more than likely, at least for the first little while, whoever gets elected is just going to be the next president and likely your life isn’t going to change too much either way.

All the people saying that Trump is the devil are probably speaking in hyperbole and all of the people saying Hillary will ruin this country I have a news flash for you and that news flash is that it’s probably not going to be as bad as you think. You’re probably still not going to get laid enough, you won’t have enough money and your hair will still turn gray. Your kids will still move out and never call and every time you hear Cats in the Cradle you’ll shed a little tear and wish that instead of paying so much attention to this election you would have made that little bastard do more chores. No free rides. Get that kid off the game system and put him to work.  You too. Put down the phone and spend some time with those who matter before they realize how big of an asshole you are and stop coming ’round.

But keep reading my site.  It’s great reading material for the shitter and your kids can wait. They’re just little assholes like their father, anyway.


First, thanks to everyone who has checked out the site.

Second, if you like my brand of bullshit, please like the things you can like and follow the things you can follow. And, much like a low-grade STD, please share these stories on social media with people you casually engage with.

If you clicked on some ads, that would help a bunch too.

Anyway, if you have story ideas ever or are interested in writing a piece, send me a DM in Twitter or on Facebook or email me to the address that’s listed somewhere on here that I forgot the password to, and I’ll get you hooked up.  No long term commitments to write, and no pay, so really it is the best of both worlds.  But some day I hope to pay people for stories and build a media empire focused on dumb jokes and snark.

That’s all.  Thanks again for reals. I like writing and this is fun.