Is “Eddie” Just “Basketball Blazing Saddles?” – Yes


I know this isn’t politics, but this is important. Also, don’t ask why I thought of this.

Eddie is just Basketball Blazing Saddles.

Whoopi Goldberg’s Eddie is an unlikely Cleavon Little’s Sheriff Bart-esque anti-hero. Both work in blue collar transportation and become the unlikely leader.

Frank Langella’s Wild Bill Burgess is the excellent Harvey Korman’s Heddy Lamar. That’s Hedley!

The Knicks franchise is Rock Ridge.

The Knicks players are the towns folks

Dwayne Schintzius’s Ivan Radovadovich is a very, very poor man’s Mongo, played by gambling Alex Karras.

Malik Sealy’s hateable Stacy Patton and Richard Jenkins’ Coach Zimmer are the equivilent but not equivilent to Gene Wilder’s fantastic Waco Kid.

Larry Johnson’s himself is the gang of rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.”

Dennis Farina’s Coach Bailey is the masterful Slim Pickens’ Taggart. I love you Dennis Farina, but get your fucking shine box when it comes to choosing between you and Slim.

Coach Zimmer’s plan at the end of the game against the Hornets is essentially Sheriff Bart’s idea to build a fake town. Someone’s gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes.

“They said you were hung?”

“And they was right!”

Marv Albert calling the last play is essentially the townsfolk of Rock Ridge explaining the plan – they’ll destroy the fake Rock Ridge but they’ll think it’s the real Rock Ridge but we’ll know it’s the fake Rock Ridge.

Ivan taking the charge after the Hornets have one last chance is basically the Waco Kid shooting the dynamite.

The whole movie of Eddie is the farting campfire scene in Blazing Saddles.

Well, that’s the end of this post.





No Posts? What Gives?


As a reminder, I use Facebook and Twitter a ton throughout the day for shorter posts, so if you like my brand of bullshit, be sure to follow on Twitter and Facebook.


It’s way easier being on the go to provide content through social media than longer form articles.  I’ll still be writing a bunch, but follow for daily stuff. Sometimes hourly.

A few things I’m working on…

What does each baseball team need in order to be successful in 2017?

Is Danny Duffy a Cy Young pitcher?

Can the Cubs repeat? Ever?

If you want my take on anything in the baseball or politics realm, be sure to comment or DM me on Facebook or Twitter.

Okay, bye. Time for band practice.

How Trump Could Still Win

Donald Trump did it.  He did just enough bullshit artistry tonight to show he can focus, to show he can make a salient point.  To prove he can stay on topic. Of course, at the end he got a little catty.  And yeah, he argues like I do when I’m feeling petty. But here’s why he did exactly what he needed to win.

  1. There’s a huge percentage of fence republicans who just needed Trump to show up once to one of these things. He did just enough tonight to convince this contingent. I have no doubt of this.
    1. He came across as honest to people who believe his shit, even when he was flat out lying
    2. He was actually complimentary and honest about Clinton a few times, and even went so far as to not blame her for some of the problems while still admitting it needed fixed
    3. He was very subdued and succinct in the first 20-30 minutes
    4. He won or drew on several questions during the debate. Rational democrats and honest republicans will re-read those comments tomorrow and realize they are pretty hollow, but a lot of people won’t re-read, and it was enough to sway fence republicans
  2. Most republicans think Trump will allow Pence to run the country day-to-day (he said so himself three months ago) and so they really feel like they are voting for Pence.
  3. He said exactly the answers he needed to resonate with republican voters. He wasn’t debating Hillary.  He had a 60 minute advertisement for why he’ll be ‘okay’.
  4. Like it or not, more than any other time he provided clear delineation between him and Hillary
  5. Trump has been playing us the whole time. The guy is a shitty business man and a shitty person, but he’s a fucking Rembrandt at PR. He had this on full display tonight.  Even I was buying into some of his bullshit.Even when I knew it was bullshit, he cast enough doubt on Hillary and said just enough things that I started to waffle a little.And she really fucked up a couple questions, especially pay for play.

All he has to do is give enough republicans the seed of an idea that he can function as an adult for more than ten minutes at a time and assure them Pence and a republican congress will run the day to day. If he comes out of the gate swinging with this message, he could actually win.

Because democrats are closer to libertarians and because republicans are so black and white on issues like abortion, his words spoke to them tonight on a profound level. Do not underestimate the power of his PR machine. Expect a different tenor in the final days of the campaign.

And don’t underestimate the power old people who will probably die before whoever is elected finishes their term will have on this election. If disenchanted millennials fail to vote en mass; if enough of them choose anarchy over reason; if enough of them vote third party – you might see some serious shit on November 8th.


Unsure Who To Vote For? Do This…

So many scales to consider.

So I was sitting in a pickup truck outside a Catholic church today, which if you know me at all is kind of a fucking random place for me (well, slightly more random than normal), but I was there for a good cause: bullshitting with my parents about the travesty that is our 2016 presidential election.

My folks are pretty open minded, but they life in western Iowa and there’s a lot of doom and gloom feeling that comes with living over there because there’s a lot of not open minded people who dwell in negativity and propagate opinions based on opinion and not facts. This is all set up which lead to, almost accidentally, me saying the real scare for me in this election is the Supreme Court justices.

With a republican congress and a republican president, we’re almost guaranteed that the outcome of the election is a huge swing in who has majority on the court. And if we get a 8-2 or 7-3 majority of fomenters (I think that’s a word) of extremist conservative demagoguery, then we’re pretty much fucked.

Basically, if you are a woman, or a gay, or a transgender, or a Mexican, or an African American, or a Muslim, or someone who recreationally uses drugs, or someone who likes Game of Thrones, or someone who likes to look at a titty online now and again without getting bleach thrown in your eyes, then you need to make sure we have some sort of balance after the dust settles from this shit storm, and I think I cracked the case on how to do it.

Continue reading “Unsure Who To Vote For? Do This…”

Morning Highlights

Trump keeps attacking people that don’t matter while managing to effectively avoid having any plan.

Jeb Bush said he may not even vote in this election, which is absolutely ridiculous.

Clinton has managed to get some zingers in on Trump throughout a whole week of events.

Neither have changed much in the polls.

Meanwhile somehow the Twins beat my boys last night despite excellent ninth inning hitting from Sal Perez. Also, the Cards manage to stay alive somehow with manna from heaven.

The good news is the Red Sox are still on pace to beat the Cubs in the World Series, which will be a really fantastic thing.  Tremendous baseball.

Let’s Think A Bit


Here’s some food for thought.  Or rather, choke on this:

History is great because I can teach someone history. It’s easy. Crack open a book.  Crack open a newspaper. It’s really great because you can read it, you can retain it, and you can improve your knowledge.

What I can’t do is train you not to be a fucking stupid asshole who hates women and Mexicans and Muslims. I can’t train you not to be a crooked son of a bitch who builds a fortune based on scams and stepping on the backs of others.

I also can’t train you to tell the truth, or make better judgement, or not to be greedy.

This is not an endorsement for Gary Johnson, but certainly if you are picking evils, he is in the best position to improve the fastest because he can memorize world leaders, and study history and current events.