So much has happened in the last 48 hours politically and basebally and I’ve been remiss in getting anything into print because I had some real life happening. I had clients in town for a night and we did the whole hang out thing, and tonight I got stuck at work until 9:30. I’m not saying this to complain.
I’m saying this because more so than ever before, this election has captivated our lives like a hit drama, because it’s a drama that hits your dick and keeps punching. I stepped out of the game for two nights so I could handle my business, and I missed a lot of stuff.
Here’s the point. You don’t care. You will still either be reading this, or like almost everyone else in the world, not read this. If you read it, hopefully the image of the election nut punching someone is funny enough to get a chuckle out of you because dick punches are never not funny, but it’s easy to forget that more than likely, at least for the first little while, whoever gets elected is just going to be the next president and likely your life isn’t going to change too much either way.
All the people saying that Trump is the devil are probably speaking in hyperbole and all of the people saying Hillary will ruin this country I have a news flash for you and that news flash is that it’s probably not going to be as bad as you think. You’re probably still not going to get laid enough, you won’t have enough money and your hair will still turn gray. Your kids will still move out and never call and every time you hear Cats in the Cradle you’ll shed a little tear and wish that instead of paying so much attention to this election you would have made that little bastard do more chores. No free rides. Get that kid off the game system and put him to work. You too. Put down the phone and spend some time with those who matter before they realize how big of an asshole you are and stop coming ’round.
But keep reading my site. It’s great reading material for the shitter and your kids can wait. They’re just little assholes like their father, anyway.